One day I hope I am the girl that walks into a room and all eyes are on her.
The trick is to get a really big hat and then scream
I’M LITERALLY A PIECE OF SHIT WHEN IT COMES TO KEEPING IN TOUCH WITH PEOPLE ONLINE OKAY I STILL KNOW YOU EXIST AND I STILL LOVE YOU I JUST AM A PIECE OF SHIT OKAY
my bf knows how to sail and stuff so we were going to fuck on a boat so when we sailed out to somewhere isolated we started making out pretty intensely and i kissed his neck and earlobe and whispered “aye aye captain” and he said “i can’t hear you” so i said it again and then he fucking went “oooooooooooooh” and started singing the fucking spongebob theme song i wanted to kill him
Aren’t we all internet explorers?
do you mean we all run slow and people don’t like us?
thats exactly what we are
do u ever wonder if anyone else in the world is listening to the exact same song as you and on the exact same lyric as you
no.. I am already familiar with the concept of FM radio
We are gathered here today because SOMEBODY *glares at coffin* couldn’t stay alive.
can we all just take a minute to imagine steve rogers’ face the first time he heard someone say “motherfucker” casually
This gets me every time
Thor’s pop-tart and Steve’s face omg
my favorite lyric from talk dirty is “but your booty don’t need explaining” because i really like to imagine a booty that NEEDS explaining. imagine jason derulo bewildered by a booty, going “someone really needs to account for this”
REFUSE to CONFORM to SOCIETAL NORMS, GENDER ROLES, or the HARRY POTTER EPILOGUE